Watching: Friends
Reading: Winifred Darch Katharine Goes to School
Well, I must say I'm slightly embarassed by my last post. It's all a bit dramatic and whatnot, but it's how I felt at the time. I was just so pissed off and upset it all came spilling out. After I posted here, I spoke to my friend Siobhan who calmed me down quite a bit. Then, on Saturday, my Mum came to visit me because she was worried and she made me feel pretty much all better (as Mother's do). She treated me to dinner and drinks and then the next day we went to the aquarium, had some food, went to see Constantine (how hot does Keanu Reeves look in that movie?!?!) and purchased a new modem. So, it was all good. Between my Mum, Siobhan and some friends at work, I feel much better about things. I realise that if my housemates feel the various ways that they do, then that's their problem. I pretty happy with who I am and how I am so I just need to let everything slide off my back. Well, that's the plan anyway!
So, on to more recent events. Some of the top brass from Nottingham came to the shop today to look around and evaluate things. I was the only non-manager they spoke to, because I'm the lucky sales plan co-ordinator and it took ages. I had to walk around with them and explain why I had done things in certain ways and why I had put things in certain places for at least 45 minutes. It was a bit scary, because I've never really had to answer to upper management before, but it went well overall. They said they were generally pleased with what I had done and that I was the first sales plan co-ordinator that they'd met who actually 'co-ordinated' (in other words, I get other people to do some of the stuff if it's related to their section), so yay for me. Still, as the icon says, thank god it's over!
Listening: Rammstein Live Aus Berlin
Reading: Tom Holt Faust Among Equals
Well. I don't know what to say really, I just know that if I don't let it out here I'll go mental and break down in tears at work or in the middle of the street or something. How's that for melodrama?
So basically, I've just been informed (at midnight, the best time for good news) that Emma, my housemate of a year and a half has decided to move out with Eileen, another housemate who decided to move a few weeks ago. The reason? David and I are too messy. Bullshit. I am so sick of Emma whining about how she's always cleaning up after me. Is she bollocks. I've cleaned up after her plenty of times, but those aren't the times she remembers, oh no. I've offered plenty of times to take part in some kind of rota which would involve sweeping, mopping etc. but was always told 'Oh, it's OK,' and now they fucking want to move out because of it. I tried, I really did. I told them that I would make a much bigger attempt to tidy up if it made them happier. I'm not even that bloody messy in the first place.
Two housemates moving out is bad, yes. The worst part? It leaves me here with David who goes out of his way to insult and belittle me when he's drunk. It all started with the 'Well, you're not very attractive so you should take any attention you get and be glad of it' talk a few months ago and progressed to the 'You're such a bitch, everyone hates you' talk of St. Patrick's night (another super time for good news). Bastard told me that I'm such a stupid cow that people don't like me and don't want to spend any time with me and would really rather that I just pissed off. My music, he says, puts people off and if I'd just listen to something with a fucking melody in it, people would like me. That's actually what he said. I have an attitude problem, I need to grow up, I need to make more of an effort to make people like me. Then, after the drunkeness, he pretends to be great friends with me again. Frankly, I can do without wasting any effort making two-faced pricks like that like me. I can fucking survive without them.
What am I going to do? I just don't know how it all got to this. I don't want to move out. I don't want Emma to move out. I don't want Eileen to move out. I could do without David quite easily. But then, Emma and Eileen haven't exactly proved to be great friends. Emma especially, since we've lived together for so long. She's never once said that what David's said to me is out of line. She's never once told him that he was out of place in saying shit like that to me. She's just laughed and carried on drinking and flirting with his fucking friends who all think that the house is full of tension because of me. I haven't done anything. Not on purpose anyway. If I was doing something that everyone hated, I would have preferred that they'd come and told me to my fucking face rather than talking about it behind my back and letting it fester until two of them decide to move out and one of them decides to tell me what a bitch I am.
Listening: Stereophonics Just Enough Education To Perform
Reading: Tom Holt Faust Among Equals (and a bundle of e-mails)
I am so tired. This whole work malarky isn't really what it's cut out to be. I mean, I work hard, I get paid shit and I'm tired all the time. I've been pretty run down for a few months now, but I thought it was getting better. Unfortunately for me, I still get days where my eyes feel all heavy and I just want to curl up and go to sleep. Still, on a more positive note, I am on the internet *g* Nope, still not over that one!
I finally got my Project Kenaz e-mail sorted out, so hopefully I'll be able to start updating etc. in the next few days. Oh, and I have a hostee!! Her name is Sara, she's wonderful and she runs a shrine for John Quinn, Impassibly Human. I know it's not much to be excited about, but I'm so pleased to have a hostee =D
Listening: Various Even Better Than The Real Thing, Vol. 2
Reading: Cardiff University Website
WOOHOO! I'm back on-line! It's an early Easter miracle *g* I finally managed to get connected by abandoning the whole wireless plan and getting a phoneline installed by the evil corporation Eircom. The landline is in, but I'm still waiting on broadband so here I sit on an old-fashioned dial-up connection as always. Still, beggars can hardly be choosers! I honestly can't believe that I managed to cope with such sporadic internet access. My sanity has certainly suffered, along with a few sites which haven't been getting the updates they deserve... But I'm back and that's all that matters now *happy sigh*
Life has been a mix between hectic and very routine lately. Working, drinking, meeting with friends, falling out with housemates and considering moving... All that kind of stuff. I've been having loads of problems with tax and have just realised that my work have failed to pay me for over 40 hours >< Despite supposedly being 'independent,' I've had to get my parents to my rent for this month and next (because of the tax and work badness). Still, it should all be sorted out soon enough and once I get my tax back I plan to buy tickets to a couple of concerts I really want to go to. Otherwise, I'm very seriously considering going back to University to do a PhD. I've really enjoyed not doing any archaeology for the past few months, but I've gotten over the idea of waiting for a while to do the PhD - I'll never save any money! The current plan is to apply to Galway (but only as a last resort - sorry Galway), Cork and Cardiff. Cardiff would be my first choice as I'd absolutely love to go back there. I've just been browsing the website and being reminded of how prehistory-centred they are. Some of you may know that this is something which always annoyed me about Cardiff, but I think they could do with some of my ideas to shake them up a bit ;)
Anyway, I'm still dancing with joy to be back on-line again! I shall answer e-mails etc. as soon as possible.
